I was reminded recently of how many things women are told with undertones of “put up and shut up,” “accept and move on,” or “that’s the best you can expect.”
Things that are life-limiting, disempowering, and often completely unrealistic.
A common one that came up again recently was:
“Just don’t lift anything heavy.”
Women are told this, or variations of it, when they receive a diagnosis of prolapse, after a C-section, following a hysterectomy for prolapse, or even after a failed prolapse surgery. In some cases, this advice is given as a recommendation for the rest of their life.
And honestly… my mind boggles.
My mind works so differently. I immediately think of all the limitations built into that advice and how, instead, I’d want to teach a woman how to lift, so she can live a more normal and limitless life.
“Just Don’t…”
I also hear things like:
“Just don’t run.”
“Just don’t squat.”
“Just don’t allow penetration.”
But what does “just don’t” really mean?
It means:
- Don’t play a sport
- Don’t do the laundry
- Don’t lift a full kettle
- Don’t have sex
- Don’t wear a tampon
- Don’t lift your child or grandchild
- Don’t pick something up off the floor
- Don’t build bone health
…and so much more.
The Cost of Limiting Advice
Sadly, I hear these life-limiting suggestions far too often.
It’s such a narrow perspective, and from what seem like just a few simple “just don’ts,” there are deep and serious consequences to a woman’s quality of life.
It changes who you get to be. It impacts your potential. It ripples out into every area of your life from your work and career to your relationships and your confidence in your own body.
So What’s the Alternative?
When you’re faced with a medical professional telling you “just don’t…,” we need to pause and understand the context. Of course, after surgery, your body needs time to heal. That early recovery period is vital. But then what? After that reasonable healing window, your body needs your help to restore function, and that begins with movement for pelvic health that supports your recovery, not restricts it.
Here’s where we need to understand something that might sound a little controversial…
Medical professionals are incredible. A surgeon, for example, dedicates their life to surgery – to developing the skill, precision, and expertise needed to perform what can often be life-saving work.
But surgeons are not movement specialists. It’s not really within their scope of practice to give long-term movement or exercise advice. Just as I, as a movement educator, wouldn’t give medical advice, it’s equally important that medical professionals don’t give movement prescriptions.
As a Polestar Educator, I teach my students the value of knowing your scope, collaborating across disciplines, and referring clients to the right experts. We all have important, distinct roles to play in supporting someone’s recovery.
Reclaiming Strength Through Movement for Pelvic Health
Movement experts understand the healing potential of the body and how movement for pelvic health can retrain, rebuild, and reawaken the body’s natural patterns. They know how to retrain it, rebuild it, and reintroduce it to efficient, natural movement patterns.
Using props, Pilates apparatus like the Reformer, and even by simply reducing the effects of gravity, we can gradually restore strength and function, progressing from supported to independent, then to more challenging environments.
We also know this truth:
“When one thing moves, all things move.”
It’s never just about the one area that had surgery. The whole body responds, and that’s actually the key to recovery. We can use the whole body to support areas that have been injured, repaired, or even removed.
Joseph Pilates himself famously worked with the first double mastectomy patient in New York. She’d been told she would never dance again. Through his work and his philosophy of Whole Body Health, she did and she lived an extraordinary, full life.
When one area is removed or altered, the body adapts. It finds a new way. It heals through movement.
My Underlying Value: Hope
My ultimate guiding value is HOPE.
There is always hope.
When women are told not to do something, my instinct is to ask:
“Okay, but what can she do? And how?”
It reminds me of an exercise I did as a young dancer with a choreographer. We created an imaginary movement sequence without any limits and then worked to create it as closely as possible in our bodies.
That’s exactly how I approach recovery and movement today.
We start with the goal, running, squatting, lifting, and then we work together to get you as close as possible to that goal. Step by step.
A Question for You
I’ll share more on this in future newsletters, but for today, I want to leave you with one simple question.
Before you accept any limitation, pause and ask yourself:
Is this true for me today?
Sometimes, we carry beliefs or old advice forward without ever questioning if it still applies.
And if it is true right now…
Does it have to remain that way?
Because this is hope.
There is always something you can do.
Your body is capable of more than you’ve been led to believe.
You are not broken. You are adaptable, resilient, and designed to heal – through movement, curiosity, and compassion.
With warmth and hope,
Claire x
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